Silver Sisters Best Tips for Gray Hair Care (& What They Wish They Knew Earlier!)

Silver, gray, white, salt & pepper… like everything else about us, our hair journey is 100% unique. The good news is that there’s a #SilverSister movement happening, and women are owning their natural beauty in the process! Don’t believe us? Follow the hashtag on Instagram and you’ll feel a wave of support and ‘Oh–I can do this’ come over you. 

Like everything else about us, our hair journey is 100% unique.

 

Why do we go gray in the first place? It’s a melanin thing. Melanin is an amino acid naturally produced in the body that acts as a pigment for our eyes, skin, and hair. As we age, our body produces less of it.

A 2022 study suggests that “after age 30, there is a 10 to 20 percent decrease in the amount of melanin produced for each following decade. By age 50, half of people will have at least 50 percent gray hair.” Yes, it’s totally normal. This is due to a number of factors: genetics (we’re looking at you, mom and dad!), background, illness, and smoking among others. Where the stress misconception comes in, say experts at Harvard Health, is due to a condition called telogen effluvium, a condition caused by stress. This condition causes hair to shed faster than normal, leading to your new hair beginning to grow in gray sooner. No, your existing hair doesn’t just ‘turn’ gray.

It goes without saying that this can be a humbling process. It’s a visual sign of our age. And as we’ve seen, it’s often chalked up to years of “stress”, which in turn can feel like a badge of incompetence or unhappiness. You wouldn’t be alone if you thought, “Great–so now my gray hair is my fault too?!” But, many women are beginning to realize the freedom of embracing their naturally graying hair, and the unique way enhances their beauty and signifies well-earned experience. 

The grow-out period can feel awkward if you’ve dyed your hair for some time, and the texture and care that your hair needed before might be completely different. If it feels thinner, it might be. The follicles themselves grow in thinner and have less of a protective coating, making your hair feel more coarse, dry, and fragile. Don’t worry—you have plenty of options. Give yourself time to figure out a new hair care system, and soak up tips from your silver sisters!

These women, in their various seasons of life, will encourage you in your gray hair or grow-out journey. Plus, they pass on their silver hair care tips and favorite products!

Photographer: Xenia Trampusch

Roxanne Gould, 60s.

“My gray hair started to show in my late twenties and I plucked them out,” Roxanne shares with us. “Then I dyed my hair all through my thirties thinking I needed to do that in order to keep my career as a model. Finally, when I turned forty, I was tired of dyeing my hair so I turned my head upside down, chopped it off and that was that.”

Roxanne adds, “Little did I know my gray hair would turn my career around for the better. I was one of the first gray hair models and I’ve been a gray hair model for over twenty years now. If I could go back… my advice to myself would have been to stop plucking the little gray hairs that grew in during my late twenties, and just leave it to grow out completely!”

“Now, I really enjoy how my own gray hair inspires so many women to let their own natural color grow in. I love how much healthier my hair has become, and how empowered it makes me feel. Every woman’s gray hair is authentic, stunning and remarkable!”

 

Roxanne’s top tips for healthy, long hair?Be gentle! Try not to apply too much heat or too often. Gray hair likes to air dry. When brushing, start at the bottom of the hair and slowly brush higher until you can brush from the roots to the tips without any knots or tangles. Sleep on soft silk pillowcases (Like Roxanne’s favorite pillowcase, available in a variety of fun prints!). Your gray hair will thank you!

Courtesy of Diane Britt-Smith

Diane Britt-Smith, 60s.

“I noticed my first silver strands at age 30. I’m 61 now, and each year it gets whiter and brighter. I feel blessed to be a silver sister, and I love that so many other women are embracing the journey too.”

“Silver sisters are fly and funky … classy and cute … striking and spectacular! There’s no other community I’d rather be in!”

 

Diane’s best advice to care for your silver hair: “Using the right products is key and often takes trial and error.” Her recent favorites come from Ecoslay (especially the conditioners!), where you can choose clean, plant-based products for your hair type, from curly to wavy to coily! Plus, the scents are delightful.

Courtesy of Karen Phillips

Karen Phillips, 50s.

I started noticing gray hairs in my teens, then started dyeing my hair in my mid 20’s. I decided to ditch the dye at 44 when it no longer felt right for me. It didn’t feel like the choice aligned with my healthy lifestyle, and I realized I was dyeing it for all the wrong reasons rooted in fear and shame. I wish I could tell my teenage self it was nothing to be ashamed of, and that I didn’t have to pluck them immediately when I saw them. I wish I had at least questioned whether dyeing my hair was right for me. It didn’t feel optional at that time.

I absolutely love how thick and healthy my hair is now. It had thinned a lot, and it came back to its full volume and health when I stopped dyeing it. I love that it’s unique and has a lot of dimension and different shades of hair colors in it.”

“Most of all, I love that I feel like me and at peace with my choice regardless of what society says. Everyone is different, but for me, this was the right decision. I only wish I had done it sooner!”

 

Karen’s tips for silver hair: “I definitely think healthy hair starts from the inside out with good nutrition and living an active lifestyle. My top tips for caring for silver hair would include ways to protect it from the sun and environmental damage to try to prevent yellowing. I use a few products to protect from heat and UV damage: Living Proof Restore Perfecting Spray and Briogeo Farewell Frizz Blow Dry Cream (but this one doesn’t have UV protection)!”

 

 

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Andie MacDowell, 60s.

“[At 63], my managers had actually said to me, ‘It’s not time [to go gray]’. And I said, ‘I think you’re wrong, and I’m going to be more powerful if I embrace where I am right now.’”

In an interview with Katie Couric, Andie remarked: “How old do you think I look? I’m going to be 65. What do you think I look 75 just because I let my hair go gray? I don’t care. I want to be old. I’m tired of trying to be young. I don’t want to be young. I’ve been young. And to be an older person trying to be young, what an effort… I just can’t keep up the charade! I can’t!”

“As it was growing out, my eyes popped and the color of them looked a little different. I liked the way my skin looked better. It empowered me more. I felt more powerful and I felt more genuine and I felt more myself.”

 

How Andie cares for her hair? “L’Oreal Paris has a really good conditioner and shampoo… the Ever Pure line,” Andie told Prevention Magazine. “It’s back in my apartment in Canada. It takes the yellow out [of grays], it makes it shinier.”

Courtesy of Chelsea Maier

Chelsea Maier, 30s.

“I started noticing a stark white hair or two here and there in high school, and I always plucked them out… whoops! About a decade ago, a thicker section of my bangs started growing in silver. I came to love that little section, but kept dyeing my hair. I started researching examples of women letting their natural hair grow out.

I was intrigued by the way my hair was changing colour, and motivated by the money I would save [by not dyeing it]. So, I decided I would commit to growing out. I worked with a phenomenal retired hair stylist who blended the white strands into the bottom half, and vowed to her (and myself) that I would not dye it again. It’s been five years!

Chelsea’s advice? “Don’t pluck those first few! Consider letting it grow out naturally sooner than later, and focus on hair health and haircuts. Find some examples of women whom have let their gray grow out. Be ready for compliments from strangers! And use purple shampoo (like this Milk Shake Silver Shine Purple Shampoo), even if you’re not fully gray.”

“It’s a little defiant to some of society’s unwritten standards of visual appearance or aging and ageist stereotypes.”

 

Five years in, and Chelsea shares only encouragement. “I love how it matches my skin tone, feels really healthy and soft, and has survived two postpartum hair journeys. And that I don’t have to think about visiting salons until I want a haircut. I love the conversations it has sparked over the years and that some folks have reached out to me saying that I inspired them to start rocking their sparklers. A few weeks ago at the grocery store, a woman came up to me and said: ‘I’m sorry I keep staring, but it’s your hair—I love it.'”

“I love that it sends the message to my children that hair is such a fun medium.”

 

 

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Kelly Hu, 50s.

“When I let go of trying to look younger than I am, it really helped to free things up,” Kelly tells Wondermind. “My hair grows so fast—within a couple of days, I’ll see white bits coming out. It was just so frustrating trying to stay on top of it or worrying about coloring my roots or worrying about continuity on screen. When I just let it go, it was so freeing … I love the way my gray hair is coming in. And I get so many compliments, especially from younger women. Younger women tend to compliment my hair a lot, and I really appreciate it because I feel like it’s making a statement as well as just being lazy about it.”

“Slow and steady wins the race” is Kelly’s advice. “I always suggest blending grays rather than covering them. As time goes by, your stylist can adjust the formula to make your grays look more like what I would call a natural highlight.”

“When I let go of trying to look younger than I am, it really helped to free things up.”

 

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Feeling inspired? Here are a few extra tips to remember as you embrace your natural silver hair care journey.

  1. Shampoo less, and try a clarifying shampoo that will add less build up. Avoid sulfates where possible!
  2. Find a purple shampoo you like! This type of treatment will treat any brassiness or yellowing that can come from heat treatment, minerals and metals in your water, sun exposure, and other environmental elements.
  3. Make moisturizing a priority.  Your gray hair needs more that in used to! Look for a hydrating mask, leave in, or deep conditioner and make it part of your weekly routines.
  4. You can manage those frizzy days. If you’re noticing extra flyaways and frizz, try styles that work. We’ve all been there–and there’s a product for that!
  5. Scalp health is important. Make sure that your products are healthy for your skin. That’s where it all starts!
  6. Growth and strength is key. Oils and serums can be a great tool to keep your hair feeling smooth, strong, and silky.
  7. Protect your hair from heat. Reduce the amount of heated styling, or use a heat protectant on your hair when you do! Look for creative ways to style your hair and embrace your natural texture.
  8. Nutrition is important. Protein, omega-3s, and vitamins b6, b12, and folic acid are key for hair health! There are lots of ways you can increase your intake of these nutrients naturally and easily.
  9. Find a favorite stylist, and keep them close. Frequent, good haircuts will help keep your locks healthy and full.

 

Have a piece of encouragement or tip for your Silver Sisters?

We’d love to hear it! Send us an email at info@movementbynm.com or a direct message @movementbynm on Instagram.

 

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